Airport or Adult Entertainment Facility?

Location: Miami International Airport

So the flight was fine, nothing fun to report. There was no sleep and a good amount of turbulence, by good amount I mean bad, too much. I made it though and now I'm in the airport. I have a few hours to kill here, I was going to venture out of the airport but it has become and quite interesting so I have decided to stay.

For example while shopping (the airport is my favourite place to shop) I found a portable 'massager' that was shaped like.. well a long really thick pen kinda thing if you get my drift. The funniest part was the caption on the box which said 'The perfect travel sized massager, shaped to pin point your pain.' RIGHT! I wanted to take a picture, but I thought I would get in trouble or at least dirty looks.

Incident number two: I just walked by a man blatantly watching porn on his laptop in the middle of the airport lounge. I decided to sit next to said man and watch the 'Boob Tube' so to speak. lol. No I didn't, I am actually sitting across from porn guy giggling to myself. I guess that doesn't make me look much better, does it.

Incident number three: I am calling this 'The Man with the Erection', surprisingly, not the man watching porn or porn guy as I called him. Still at the airport, the happiest place on earth in my opinion, proves itself to me, yet again. I just watched a couple re-unite and it was touching. Unfortunately, I was sitting and they were standing so their (specifically his) crotch was at my eye level. This of course is how my innocent eyes gazed upon his erection. At first I thought he actually had something in his pocket, but then I noticed, as I couldn't release my eyes, that it changed in a fashion that only an erection would (would not wood ha ha... now I'm giggling again)

Anyway, it is now 6 pm I still have time to kill and all I want to do is sleep, but not sure where I can :-)